


Uni Days: Freshman Year, Term 1

by FangirlTrash XOs (XOs)



Series: Uni Days [1]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: After World Academy, Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, I'm Bad At Tagging, Students, University, University Problems, World University
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-22 12:25:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14308590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XOs/pseuds/FangirlTrash%20XOs
Summary: Sakura Honda has worked incredibly hard her entire life, landing herself a spot in the prestigious and internationally famous World University. Follow her as she deals with the responsibility of living away from home for the first time, pushing herself out there to meet new people, and struggling to create a balance between her grades and her social life as she endeavours to make a positive reputation for herself in the first term of her first year!





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going on this really crazy writing spree, so yes, this is the fifth or so Fic I've posted in the past few days. I can't stop writing! I don't want to lose the ideas as they pop into my head.
> 
> This Fic is probably very close to my soul. In it, I'll be injecting pieces of my own university experiences, just for those who haven't been yet can get a taste of what it's like for someone with zero social skills and an incredibly unhealthy attachment to their family and home, lol. 
> 
> Also, I'll put the names of characters and who they are in the End Notes, since some names I use are canon, some fanon, and some names I found myself and liked for each character. I'll also put additional notes in at the end.

* * *

**It was Sakura Honda's sixth birthday and she felt incredibly proud that she had managed to keep her beautiful, long black hair as a silky sheen for the occasion.** Her mother had patiently plaited it that morning, all long strands neatly tucked away into an efficient braid, and Sakura wore a bow just to make herself feel like a pretty princess. It was going to be the best day of her life and she would make sure that all her friends knew it. Sakura had passed through the school gates proudly, swishing her hair this way and that. As it was a school day, she had planned for a birthday party that weekend, but her friends were still quick to congratulate her. She was one of the youngest in the year, so all of her friends had already reached their sixth birthdays. That only made Sakura prouder, for she had finally hit the milestone that all of her friends had achieved.

Her first class of her birthday had been Maths. For Sakura, that had been fine, since she excelled in that subject. She was one of the top in her class, speeding ahead as numerical problem solving came easily to her. With a pencil at the ready she set about to work through the basic fractions their teacher had set before her. Sakura would prove that, even on her birthday, she was a hard worker.

Someone tugged at her hair.

Turning with gritted teeth, Sakura wasn't surprised to see that it was Ivan Braginsky pulling at her lovely plait. She glowered at his horrible face with that mean smirk he wore. For some reason, the nasty little boy continuously pestered her. He was irritating beyond belief and always had been, pretending he was better than everyone else. Ivan seemed to think he couldn't take on the other boys, since he was the smallest boy in class. As a result, it seemed he chose to pick on those smaller than  _him_ , which incidentally meant Sakura, as most other girls were taller than him, too. She thought he was a horrible person, a nasty bully who she couldn't wait to be rid of when she graduated to World Academy for middle school and high school. World Academy was one of the greatest schools to date and Sakura felt she would be the only student to get there, not to boast or anything.

" _Stop_ that," she angrily whine, grasping her head and pouting at him.

"What?" he gave her the usual twisted smirk and grabbed her hair again. " _This_?"

" _Ouch_ , that  _hurts_ ," Sakura struggled with his fist. "That  _hurts_! It's my birthday, so you're not allowed to be mean to me!"

" _It's my birthday_ ," he mimicked in an irritatingly high pitch.

"I  _don't_ sound like that," she winced as he pulled at her hair again. " _Stop it_. You're just jealous that it's  _my_ birthday and you probably just want to copy my work again."

"Ivan," the teacher noticed the fiasco and walked over, hands on her hips. "Stop that immediately. Don't you know it's not nice to pull other people's hair."

He pouted and let go, sitting back in his chair and lowering his eyes to the table. "Sorry, Mrs Asai..."

"Don't do that again," Mrs Asai sighed, before looking at Sakura. "Are you OK?"

Sakura made a point of rubbing the back of her head. "Yes, Mrs Asai."

Their teacher nodded and wandered across the classroom to help another student with their work. Sakura looked back at Ivan and sent him her greatest sneer, before turning away, making sure to flick her hair in his face as she did so. Smugly, she scribbled down more numbers, glad to have had the last laugh. Mrs Asai often sided with her anyway, because Ivan was always the one to-

Sakura flinched as she heard the snip of scissors and a sudden weightlessness on her head. At first, she was hesitant to check the truth, but then she raised fingers to the back of her head and found the spikiness of the shortened strands. The plait- where was the plait? She frantically felt around her head, before turning in her seat and staring down at the long braid of hair that had fallen to the floor. She shrieked, grasping at the back of her head again and mussing the uneven locks. Her hair was  _gone_! And there was Ivan, a proud smile stretched across his cruel baby face and the weapon in hand.

"Ivan!" Mrs Asai rushed across the classroom. "To the headmistress' office! Immediately!"

"What?" Ivan gawked, setting the scissors down. "But  _that's not fair_."

" _Don't_ argue back!"

That had been the end of Sakura's long hair, as well as the last of her self-confidence. In one single cut, her esteem had been completely removed, replaced with choppy, short hair that would take a long time to become neat once more and a deep-rooted insecurity that would never truly leave. A year later, her father got a placement across the country. It was the perfect excuse for Sakura's mother to uproot from their previous neighbourhood and establish the Honda family elsewhere. Sakura never went to World Academy, but at least she would never have to see that horrible Ivan Braginsky ever again.

* * *

I tugged at the short strands of hair and gazed around the room I would call home for the rest of the year. It was far smaller than what I was used to and instead of a double bed, a single on sat in the corner, completely stripped of all sheets. A desk sat on the other side, lined against the wall with a little shelf provided and drawers attached on one end. A wardrobe stood near the drawers and another door near the bed most likely led to the en suite bathroom, which I was relieved to have. The carpets were a murky brown in colour, sprinkled with red and grey grains of noise colour. The interior decorator had attempted to match the carpet with red curtains which hung to either side of the window. Browns, oranges and mustard yellows were mixed in repeating square patterns, an attempt to throw a modern appeal to the murky little prison. The walls were eerily bare, a vacant cream in colour, although I could see newer patches of a roughly done paint job to some kind of ominous remark or stain possibly caused by the previous owner. It was such a grim little enclosure and I couldn't see myself being there for the entire term.

I had made it. I was in World University, the greatest academic institution for the highest level of education. This was something I had always dreamt of, yet I couldn't help but feel nervous at the same time. Nausea had clung to me for about a month now and a constant demotivation had hung around my clouded mind. Mum had ended up doing all the packing and the car ride had seen very little to no responses from me for the entire journey. This was the most nerve-wracking experience of my entire life.

"Looks nice," Dad remarked, knowing I didn't like it, and desperate to cheer me up.

A non-committal nod was all he could receive. Clearing his throat, he rushed away to sort out the heaps of bags strewn across the floor. I didn't want to touch anything. The more things that were packed away, the less time I had with my parents. All I could do was stand to one side and wring my wrists, hoping things could improve. Each bag was opened and the contents removed, separated across the room with various compartments. I had no control of what was happening and felt powerless to stop it. Mum had wandered off into the kitchen to allot a cupboard for me. She had gathered all the cooking ware and transported it there. I doubted I would do a lot of cooking, considering I was on a catered plan at university. Still, Mum had insisted and I had been powerless to counter her. Now my entire world was being packed away into unfamiliar drawers.

Mum wandered back into the room, a simple frown on her face. Her hair was drawn back into a messy bun and she looked tired. I noted the bag in her hands that had once contained the kitchen stuff was now empty. It seemed she had made short work of such an important task. I almost felt like things were moving far too quickly, as if there was a need to have me sent off as swiftly as possible. Clasping at my wrists, I watched as Dad unfolded the laundry bags we had bought from IKEA. Naturally, it was a DIY task, with a multitude of screws and poles to assemble together. I would normally offer to help, but I couldn't move my mouth properly. Instead, I could only watch as my life began to crumble all around me. I felt I needed to be less dramatic, but seeing my parents prepare me for a solo lifestyle was quite difficult.

"These things always look easier than they actually are..." Dad muttered under his breath, earning the attention of both Mum and I.

She sighed shortly, before setting down the empty bag. "I've picked the cupboard closest to the sinks for you. You don't need to worry about that. Shall we make the bed?"

I glanced towards the empty mattress with a thin piece of cloth stretched across it. It seemed so isolated. I couldn't believe I would be spending the next nine months stretched out across that thing. There would be no more tea in the morning, unless I made it myself, nor would I have Pochi to greet me when I hurried downstairs. In fact, that would be something I would notice the most. Numbly, I nodded and stood to one side of the bed, clasping the first sheet in my hands. This would be something I would need to remember across the year. Mum was quicker, pulling the covers over the corners and tucking them in. Clumsily, I copied her, watching a few creases appear across the once flawless sheets. I could see uncertainty in her eyes, but she made no comment and instead moved on to the duvet. Together, we shifted it down into the covers and laid it across the bed. The pillows were fluffed and thrown on and, one by one, bags stuffed began to reduce in size, until nothing remained inside of them.

Dad assessed the room once the unpacking had finished, before wandering towards the window. "It's a shame the view isn't that nice."

I followed his gaze and saw concrete on the other side. There was a courtyard below and many more flats to look upon during the day. Dad was right. It wasn't a nice view. There was no greenery, unless I craned my neck to the side and looked towards a lake in the distance. From what I remembered, the campus had more greenery, but I wouldn't see much of that until the week progressed.

"I think it's fine," Mum pressed, and when I turned, she was sending Dad a harsh stare.

"Yes, of course," he rubbed the back of his head and smiled at me. "This is going to be exciting."

His words fell on a flat heart. 'Exciting' wasn't exactly the word I had in mind for this. University had been the source of my worries for a month, now. A part of me wanted to pack all of my things again once more and leave immediately. But I couldn't do that. We had already paid and this was the next stage of my life. It was supposed to be my most exciting three years. The things passing through my head and chest must've been initial thoughts of the start of the year. I was sure they would pass.

"You'll call a lot, yeah?" Dad turned to me. "Just to make sure you're OK."

I nodded, heart in throat.

"We should probably head off," Mum sensed the charged emotions building up inside of me and gathered various bags. "We'll leave you a suitcase, so you can always come home if you need to."

'Home' was about two hours away by the train. I felt I'd be taking regular visits there as soon as I had the chance.

"Goodbye, sweetie," Mum clasped my hands before pulling me into a tight hug. "If you need us, call. And remember to speak to your flatmates."

I nodded, fighting off the tears building up in the corners of my eyes. Dad hovered awkwardly by Mum. His mouth wobbled a little, so he quickly pulled me into his arms before letting go. These goodbyes felt like they applied to forever. I could feel a pain building up inside of me. I didn't want them to leave. I wanted them to stay with me forever. I wanted to run after them and god home with them. How was I supposed to stay in this isolated little square of a room for the next year or so? I had always been reliant on my parents, so to see them suddenly disappear was-

"Goodbye," Mum smiled sadly one more time before she let my door close with a soft click.

Strangely, I didn't chase after them. Some part of me had expected to run after them, to plead for more farewells, but talking to them hurt more than it helped. It was the first time I'd viewed my parents in such a light. I felt the first warm tracks run down the cheeks and touched my face to find it wet. This was too difficult. The smallest of sobs escaped my mouth and that was enough to send me into distraught tears. Sitting on the bed, I buried my face into my hands, heaving out my quiet cries, not wanting anyone else to hear me. It was difficult to breathe, but I had to keep telling myself that everything was fine.

Some part of me wanted to curl up and remain in this cold place for the rest of the day and night, but Mum was right. I needed to meet my flatmates. We had messaged on SmileNote in a group chat beforehand and one girl appeared far friendlier compared to the others. Her name had been Emilia Moore, although I hadn't seen much of her upon arriving. It seemed it was a rule of flatmates to avoid the scene when family was still in the vicinity. I had bought a ticket to a 'Welcome Party' held at my accommodation halls. Named after general historic figures, I had landed a place in Tudor halls, which were the central hub of student accommodation, located above the cafeteria and also where the maintenance desk could be found. It was a relief that I was near all the convenient necessities. My flatmates seemed to have been going as well. I was too nervous to play drinking games- those had never been more forte- so I hoped I could get away with the first night without having any. I hoped I could still fit in with the university student atmosphere.

Wiping my eyes, I tried to like my room. My parents hadn't set up my laptop and it was still in its case.  I didn't have the energy to touch it. I just felt sick and lonely and I didn't have the courage to introduce myself just yet. After a while of sobbing about it, I finally steeled myself to make tea in the kitchen. I had dried my eyes and dragged myself into the small compact space. There were two ovens, three mini fridges and eight cupboards for us to use. There were plenty of drawers and various other cupboards to be used. A microwave sat in the corner and a toaster and kettle had been brought, presumably, by two of the other flatmates. There was a freezer and a small living area with couches, a dining table and a small side table. This flat had been designed for eight people. Alongside me, there were seven others. It was strange to think I would be living alongside complete strangers.

Tearfully, I hastily made myself a cup of tea after locating my own cupboard next to the sink. There was a pressing wait of misery, but I had to try and get over the initial fears that university posed.

I heard the shuffling of feet and turned to see a girl had wandered into the kitchen. She had short blonde hair bouncing around her head in golden curls and bright blue eyes. My head automatically attributed to her a sense of popularity and confidence. She offered a somewhat hesitant smile, maybe because my eyes were still slightly red and leant against the dining table, keeping a level distance between us.

"Hey, you're... Sakura, right?" she tilted her head to the side. "I'm Emi. Emilia."

She seemed very friendly. I swallowed my fearful emotions aside and smiled. "I'm Sakura. Yes. It's very nice to meet you."

She bobbed her head, looking easily assured of herself. "You're going out tonight, aren't you?"

"I am, yes," I clasped my hands together.

"I arrived yesterday," Emilia continued. "As did a few others. I've spoken to the others, and three of them are coming out with me tonight, if you want to join?"

"O-of course," I nodded. I'd need to think about what to do for dinner. I was still incredibly worried about my current situation, so nothing too heavy going. Catering didn't begin until tomorrow, Monday.

Emilia hovered for a little while longer, before dipping her head in acknowledgement and angling herself towards the exit. "I'll... see you later, yeah?"

"Yes," I nodded, trying to act normal. I thought I was doing a good job, so far.

She nodded and left the room, leaving me once more to my own devices. Wearily, I filled the kettle and watched the water slowly, but gradually boil. It was relieving to think my flatmates were nice. The thought of having kind people around me was comforting. Maybe I really could adapt to this new life? Maybe I wouldn't need to continue relying on the home comforts my parents could provide? As soon as I could, I would let them know I was doing alright. That was all they would need to hear. I would enjoy tonight and then I would message them the next day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sakura Honda: Female Japan  
> Ivan Braginsky: Russia  
> Emilia Moore: Female America  
>  
> 
> \- Sakura is one of the youngest in her year because I'm laying the school term out in the Japanese system. Their academic year starts in April and ends in March.
> 
> \- University was a very big step for me. I had loads of people always telling me that it would be the most exciting moment of my life, so when I arrived and I felt terrible, I felt like I was wasting the university experience- I felt like I needed to pretend to be happy, which just really wasn't true in the slightest.   
> \- I also felt like I needed to drink and party to fit in, but I'll get more into that in the next chapter.


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

**Packet rice wasn't nearly as appealing as the beautifully cooked or steamed dishes Mum could always whip up out of the blue.** It was something I had eaten in the past and often enjoyed. Now, I could barely stomach it. With a sigh, I set it aside on the table, no longer interested in food. I had checked my phone plenty of times, hoping desperately that a message from my parents had appeared by some whim of luck. Nothing had turned up. It seemed both Mum and Dad had deemed it better to leave me to my own devices. I didn't want that. I wanted to be spoken to, yet at the same time, reaching out felt like a weakness.

There was a knock on the door. Breathing in deep, I stood and approached, pushing down on the handle and looking to see who stood there. Emilia smiled, another girl with long blonde hair tied back into pigtails hovering just by her shoulder.

"Hey, Sakura," she said. "We were gonna head off to another flat for pres. There's a girl I know and she's hosting at her flat."

"Sure thing," I wasn't  _really_ in the mood, but since I had bought the wristband, I figured it was worth the effort.

Before going to university, there had been a promotional offer for Freshers' Week. Ten thousand yen, it had been and I'd been hesitant to go for it. That had been until I had begun reaching out to my flatmates via the flatmate finder the university had provided. Different members of the flat provided their details and you could find them on SmileNote. Emilia and I had been the first to speak, with little word from the rest of the flat. When I had expressed my doubts, she had urged me to buy the wristband offer, so that we could attend the events together. It made perfect sense. It was the opportunity to get to know my other flatmates. I had collected the wristband after my parents had left. It had come with a free T-shirt. As long as I wore the wristband, I could attend the events for free. I'd need ID for a club, but the 'Welcome Party' was held outside the halls, in the courtyard.

"This is Rose, by the way," Emilia gestured to the other girl. "She studies Laws."

"Hey," the other lifted a brief hand, before letting it fall back down.

"Two of the guys are coming along, too," Emilia jerked a thumb down the hallway.

I nodded, stepping out of the comfort of my room and closing the door behind me.

"I forgot to say- I study Bio-Med," Emilia pointed to herself. "What about you?"

"History," I locked my door.

She peered around me. "Bringing anything to drink?"

"Oh, um..." I wasn't a major drinker, mostly at formal dinners and I felt too unsettled to go around getting completely smashed. "Maybe Coke. I'm not... drinking tonight."

"OK," Emilia shrugged and I caught sight of the Smirnoff Ice in her hand. Rose held wine.

"I'll just... get it," I swallowed and hurried to the kitchen.

Knowing Mum, she'd have put it in the fridge. Throwing each of the three fridges open, the one with my stuff was on the end. There was milk, for when I caved and needed tea, but the cans of Coke were right where they should've been. Grasping a couple, I headed back into the hallway to see two guys had joined them. One was Asian, with a friendly smile, and the other looked a little quieter, an impassive expression on his face.

"This is Lin and Milen," Emilia said. "Shall we go?"

She received a few blank nods. It seemed Emilia would be the talkative one amongst us, although I was sure Lin may begin once we became more comfortable. Almost rigidly, we set down the stairs. We were on the top floor, which had been painful when dragging the bags upstairs, but was something I would have to grow accustomed to across the year. Emilia explained, along the way, that her friend's flat was on the other side of the complex. It wasn't a problem; I was hardly dressed to go out in jeans, a T-shirt and trainers on my feet. Everyone else had also opted for the casual appearance, which helped.

There was little conversation, other than what courses we were studying, where we came from and other small details about our lives. It was strange to think I'd be living with these people for the next year. Lin studied Accounting and Finance, whereas Milen was an Ancient History student. That was close to my course, History. We arrived at a flat that looked nearly identical to our one. Emilia pressed her finger to the bell, a shrill, sharp ring echoing across the background noise of chatter and distant music. Milling around, I watched as a girl rushed over, fighting the door open and peering out at us with a smile.

"Hey, come in," she beamed, nonplussed about our identity or anything. "We're in the middle of Ring of Fire if you guys wanted to join in?"

"Sure," Emilia entered the place as if she owned it. Were the two friends? It seemed like they didn't know each other.

"Our kitchen is just here," the girl led us into the small kitchen that looked very similar to our own one. "If you need the toilet, you can use mine. It's the room on the end, yeah?"

A few others were gathered around the table, cards spread out around them, drinks present. Already, some of them appeared drunk. Even the girl who had let us in wasn't sober.

"Take a seat," she urged.

"Who're these?" a guy asked.

The girl shrugged. "They came along for pres."

"Which is your friend?" I quietly asked Emilia.

She frowned. "None of them. I think this is the wrong flat. We'll stay anyway."

I leant away, trying not to let the panic get to me. How could we just wander into a  _random_ flat? One by one, the others began taking their seats. I found myself on the end, next to Emilia, with a blank seat on the other side. Ring of Fire was a card game for drinking. The rules were built upon layers and I couldn't say I recalled any of them. Sitting there, I felt completely out of place. For starters, I wasn't drinking alcohol tonight. I had been out before, but never as much as others, what with my birthday being later compared to my other classmates. I'd never really played before, but I'd heard of it.

"Help yourselves to anything," the girl gestured to the drinks on the table. "Seriously."

"Seven!" another girl shouted, face flushed and completely wasted already.

"What's that?" I whispered to Emilia.

"Hm?" she glanced at me with an arched eyebrow. "Heaven. You have to point up."

"What?" I started.

"If you see her pointing up, you need to do that, too," Emilia instructed.

"OK..." I frowned and watched as more numbers were flung around, each time me asking Emilia what the numbers meant. Each time she breathed in and sighed.

"Heaven!" the word was shout out a few times. Glancing this way and that, I noticed the drunk girl had her arm raised and was waving it wildly about, shrieking the word over and over again. Numbly, I raised my hand.

"You have to drink!" the other girl pointed to me. She was seated nearby, lifting a bottle of vodka and approaching.

"Oh, I'm not drinking tonight," I told her.

Her eyes widened and she nodded emphatically. Standing in front of me, she hovered the bottle over my glass, not enough to pour but enough to pass it off.

"We'll pretend, then," she told me quietly. "Just pretend you're having alcohol. They'll totally believe you."

I couldn't understand why she'd go to such great lengths. Why not just let me go tee total? I went with it, because she was trying to be nice,  _trying_ to be supportive and let me fit in with the atmosphere. And when she stepped back, I just smiled and drank. It didn't affect me; of course it didn't, it was just Coke. But there were impressed cheers that rang around the room. I couldn't boast; I had nothing to boast about. Emilia cast me a side glance, but said nothing. More cards were picked up, with care taken not to break the circle, to avoid having to drink the concoction of alcohol in the middle.

When I lifted a card, I had a Queen.

"What is it?" the girl asked. She was far more supportive than anyone else.

"Queen," I replied.

"Question!" she cheered.

"What's that?" I blinked.

"If you ask a question and someone answers, they have to drink," the girl said, before her face dropped into a thoughtful frown. "Oh, shit. I have to drink."

She swigged whatever it was that she was on and more cards were lifted. A King saw more poured into the jug at the centre. I desperately didn't want that. How would I be able to avoid drinking  _that_?

The girl picked up a card and nudged the circle aside. A collective gasp spread out across the table and the boys began chanting "Chug! Chug! Chug!"

"I can't do that!" she laughed. "I'll drink it, but I can't down it!"

She lifted the jug and sipped, before cringing, her face contorting with disgust. Glancing awkwardly at me, the game continued. For some reason, I felt claustrophobic, even sipping my Coke, and I just wanted a bit of a breather, even if the window was open, cool air drifting in.

"Is it alright if I use the toilet?" I asked the girl.

"Sure, follow me," she said, rising and leaving the room, me in tow.

She brought me to the end of the corridor, to the disabled room.

"I was really lucky to get this room," she explained, opening it. "It's bigger than all the others. Toilet's right there."

She had gestured to the other door, which I began to approach.

"Wait!" I came to a halt and looked at her. "I-I'm gonna pour some of this out first." She stumbled to the sink. "It's really disgusting. I don't want to drink it."

Slowly, she begun upending the jug's contents into the sink. It was a murky brownish-orange, like watered-down tomato sauce, or vomit. I could see why she was refraining. It looked ominous. She glanced at me with a smile, considered, and poured a little more down the drain.

"They'll never know," she told me. "You won't tell them, will you?"

"Of course not," I frowned.

"Thanks," she beamed, leaving the bathroom. "All yours."

I was quick to use it and it was nice to get a little space, even if it was in a stranger's cramped bathroom. For some reason, my throat felt constricted. It was the nerves, the anxiety about being in a completely new place. She brought me back to the main room, where I seated myself back down between Emilia and Rose. The game didn't last much longer than that. Soon, people began heading to the Welcome Party, according to the boy who kept looking out of the window to see the field down below. When enough people had gone, we filtered out of the flat and wandered down towards the Welcome Party. I made sure my wristband was visible, sticking close to Emilia and Rose. They were familiar faces, people whom I could talk to and hang out with.

It was dark and people crowded around the entrance, being waved in. Thumping music could be heard in the distance. We were drawn to it like flies, seeing a main stage in the distance with heads bobbing and people wildly dancing. I didn't know what songs they were; some act had come along to present their rise to fame. Emilia rushed straight for the main stage, Rose in tow and me trailing after them, uncertain of where to go. I was jostled around, drowned in the crowds that surged around me. I thought I was going to get bowled over and somebody spilt beer on my jumper. If I had been drunk, I wouldn't have minded- I wouldn't have  _noticed_. But I was stone cold sober and it sucked. I wasn't in the mood to drink; I wasn't in the mood to party. It was pathetic, but all I wanted to do was curl up and sob into my pillow.

Looking around, I saw the flat we had just hung out with. Where were Emilia and Rose? Squinting, I stuck close to these people I had just met, whom I didn't know. One of the boys sung a song with me, but he was too drunk to remain focused and swiftly turned away. When they moved, the girls grabbed hands in a daisy chain, including me, much to my comfort. On my phone, I messaged Emilia on SmileNote Messenger. I couldn't bank on her seeing it past the loud music, but it was worth a try.

We ducked into the student bar, pushing past people and weaving in and out of doors. It was hard to keep track. I clutched at the drunk girl's cold hand, trying not to break loose. They let go once we were back outside and I looked at my phone once more. She looked, but didn't answer. Maybe she was too drunk, but it still felt horribly isolating. When I looked up, I saw the others had drifted away. "Silent Disco" was thrown around a lot and I locked eyes on a crowd down below. If I was going to find anyone, then it would down there. Heading over, I dipped into the thronging crowd, until I was pushed against metal grating. I could see staff handing out headphones for the Silent Disco.

"Stop reaching through the bars!" one woman was shouting. "And return the headphones here afterwards."

I could see the headphones, so close, but past the bars. I could hear the pounding of my heart and my breaths were coming short. Wherever I looked, there was someone else, their shoulders, their heads and I couldn't find the fresh air my head so needed. In fact, I felt sick. The moment my mind turned to that, I couldn't help but gag. This was my worst nightmare, being sick in a crowd. I was sure everyone would pass it off for having drunk too much, but I still didn't want to be ill in front of everyone here. I didn't ant to be sick on my shoes, or some other poor soul's feet. I began shoving past, trying to get away, submerged in the crowd. I needed to escape the crowd's centre. Music in my head, heart in my throat, sweat prickling my skin. I felt hot and cold, I was spinning, I was struggling to push past everyone. Then I spotted the girl from earlier and she locked eyes with me.

"Hey!" she grinned.

I opened my mouth. I really tried to speak, to tell her I needed to get away, to get out of the crowd, but words made me want to be sick. I swallowed them back, desperation rising up within me.

"Claustrophobic!" the girl yelled and begun shoving at people. "She's claustrophobic; she needs to get out!"

Instantly, people tried their hardest to move aside. Somehow, her voice extended beyond mine. Hands helped me move out of the crowd and then there was fresh air and my mind felt... all the clearer. I was still panicked and felt vulnerable to anything at any given moment.

"Thank you!" I turned, searching for her in the swarming mass of bodies, but she was already gone, merged into the crowd that seethed for their headphones like bees at their hive.

I could've waited. I could've tried to get into the party mode, but I felt exhausted and there was still a pit of nausea at the bottom of my stomach. Instead, I felt exiled by my own flatmates. Stumbling backwards, I turned and swiftly walked across the grass, fighting off the fears that swirled around me. I was almost there; I could see the gates that would help me leave and return me to my room. Almost... almost-

"Hey," someone grasped my wrist. I could see a flash of golden eyes and a smile. "You're on my course, aren't you?"

We had a History group chat on SmileNote. I was barely seeing the girl standing before me, so I couldn't say for sure who she was. There were about two-hundred people on that chat.

"Are you leaving?" she asked.

"I-I... I'm really not feeling it," my heart was pounding as my feet began carrying me away.

"Wait, stay!" she beamed. "We'll hang out."

"I'm really not- I'm tired," excuses. I needed excuses. "I, uh... I got here today. I'm sorry."

"You sure?" she almost sounded concerned.

"Yeah, sorry," I hurried off, unable to look at her, embarrassed and ashamed that I couldn't have fun like everyone else was.

Hopefully, she would forget that. Hopefully, she wouldn't remember me like this and instead, when I walked into the first lecture, she would view me as someone normal. Grass flattened underneath my feet and I terribly regretted getting the wristband for the Freshers' events. What a waste of ten thousand yen. I'd have to sell the wristband, especially if the rest of the week went like this. Hurrying back to my room, I climbed all sets of stairs and unlocked the door with fumbling hands. Scowling, I pushed open the bedroom door and locked in behind, collapsing into my room and finally heaving out my tears. I couldn't do this. I wanted to go home. The music was dimmed in this small space I was supposed to make my home, but I felt miserably desperate to go back to Mum and Dad's loving arms.

Later that week, I would sell the wristband for eight thousand yen. That was the price of the cheaper Freshers' deal and it was the best deal I would get for it. I kept the T-shirt. I wasn't about to give that away, but I was content to hole myself up in my room for the rest of the week. I missed dinner a few times, but slowly began to get into the routine of eating at six with Lin and Milen. Routine was comfortable and I began to look forwards to the routine of lectures.

Freshers, ultimately, had been the worst week of my entire life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sakura Honda: Female Japan  
> Emilia Moore: Female America  
> Rose Taylor: Female England  
> Lin Chen: Male Taiwan  
> Milen Petranov: Bulgaria
> 
>  
> 
> \- I had a really bad time at Freshers. It was definitely the loneliest week of my entire life. Some part of me felt like an alien who was studying human culture. I really just felt so out of place, it was unbelievable.  
> \- But I also know a lot of people who really enjoyed Freshers. For me, it was difficult. I was going through a lot, whereas others formed friendships that have lasted them for the entirety of uni.  
> \- My best advice is to follow your gut instincts. Once I chose to stay in my room and adjust to my surroundings, I felt a lot better, but others loved the opportunity to let loose and let go of their stresses. It really depends on each person's preferences. Stay in your comfort zone for the first week.


	3. Chapter 3

* * *

**I looked in the mirror.** Luckily, it was full length so that I could see my entire outfit reflected back at me. That was one of the positives about the room, even if the mirror had a strange smudge running along its side. Strapping my rucksack onto both shoulders, I stepped out of the room and locked it behind me. I couldn't say I trusted my flatmates, yet; in fact, I still felt bitterly about Emilia and Rose, who had abandoned me on the first night. I hadn't though I had been _that_ bad. Moreover, it was all a matter of privacy. I didn't want someone going into my room for a snoop, not that I believed anyone would  _really_ do that. Today, I wanted to make a good impression on other people on my course, so I had opted for a nice fitting sweater, skirt and tights. Apparently, according to my cousin Kiku, everyone tried extra hard in the first two weeks of uni, before more numbers began turning up in sweatpants, and then even more numbers dwindled to pyjamas. I'd have to wait in anticipation for that...

The walk to World University's campus from the halls was about twenty-five minutes. The weather was still warm and only getting nicer for the arrival of spring. It was only April and the cherry blossoms were already beginning to lose their bloom. Pink petals fluttered all along the pathways, covering the ground entirely. How fleeting to have such a short-lived existence. Plenty of other students were headed into class. As far as classes went, I didn't have a particularly big timetable. A lot of my days were left idle and without a lot to do. That probably meant I would have more work to do in between classes, such as extra reading and seminar preparation. Hopefully, though, it wouldn't be  _too_ much.

Looking at my timetable, my first module of the week was Modern History: the 20th Century. I would have a lecture and a seminar for that. Another module was Medieval: the Tudors. For that, I had another lecture and seminar. I was also to do a project on a subject I had chosen. I had wanted to study the Qing Dynasty, purely because there was little attention paid to Chinese history compared to European and American. The project class was two hours long and was organised like a seminar, with twelve other students having chosen to pick the same topic. I had also chosen an optional module on America in the 19th Century, that may or may not have been related to my love of the Hamilton musical. That also had a lecture and a seminar. In total, I had around eight hours of classes each week. My subjects changed in the next semester, but that was something I'd worry about at a later time.

Arriving at the classroom, I couldn't help but feel a little bit nervous. This would be the first time I properly met my coursemates. A lot of them would be sharing lectures with me. Already, a crowd had begun to gather outside the lecture hall, a sea of faces that would take me forever to recognise. People were already talk as if they knew each other. The History group chat on SmileNote Messenger had been blowing up over Freshers', with a lot of the others meeting up to go out. I hadn't been included in that, which was something I both regretted and was relieved about. It meant I would be a little bit behind in getting know everyone.

The first person wandered into the lecture and the stream followed after them. Where would I sit? I supposed the front, since there didn't seem to be anyone else going for those seats. Awkwardly, I shuffled down the row, hoping I wouldn't be ridiculed for sitting at the front. I had to remind myself that this wasn't school. Learning wasn't lame anymore, in theory. Or, that was what I liked to  _tell_ myself. Deep down, I knew it would still be the nerds who continued to work their hardest to attend every lecture, rather than use the online recording of it whenever they were too tired or hungover to bother attending class. Always, the nerds would be the ones writing down every word and details, exams and assignments being their fuel for the rest of the year.

So, I sat at the front of the lecture hall without complaint. I was a nerd, after all.

As expected, most others worked their hardest to avoid being seen. At the rate this was going, I would be the only person seated in this row. A nervous sweat broke out across my skin. That would be embarrassing.

"Hey, mind if I sit here?"

I turned my head and looked up- and up. The boy standing there was incredibly tall, although it may have been because I was sitting down. With his bag slung over his shoulder, he looked like any other university student. Something about him was uncannily familiar, although I knew I would've remembered seeing him at the Welcome Party last week. Moreover, I couldn't think of any celebrities to match his face with. I definitely hadn't seen him before, with his broad, towering frame and the longish, boyish ash blonde hair that threatened to fall into his calming violet eyes if it grew any longer. He was a handsome boy; having attended an all-girls school, any male had become a miracle wonder to myself and my friends, but I could definitely tell that this boy would be considered more attractive than others.

"Yeah, sure," I gestured, trying not to stare. "I mean, I don't mind. Sure."

He dumped his bag on the floor and dropped down into the seat. It was comforting to know I was approachable enough to sit next to. Chancing a glance at his strangely familiar face, I couldn't help but take in the shape of his jaw, the prominent nose, or the dark lashes that framed the soothing violet colour of his eyes. There was definitely something about him that told me we had met before, but I couldn't say what.

He cast an uneasy glance in my direction and I hastily turned my head away. I needed to stop staring. Going to an all-girls school had done little to nothing for my confidence around boys.

"Your name?" he looked awkwardly back towards the front of the classroom as more people sat around us.

"Sakura," I frowned and he whipped his head round to look at me.

The boy studied me for a moment, before leaning back into his chair. Based on his body language, he was either guarded or deciding whether I was normal or not.

"And you?" I added hurriedly, hoping to make decent conversation.

"Uh..." he didn't want to tell me? Clearly, he was stalling. "Jim."

"Jim?" I wasn't sure if I'd heard right, but the class fell silent all of a sudden.

"Hello," our lecturer suddenly strode into the room, sapping all attention in his direction. "About time we started the first term. All that Freshers' business really is a waste of time, in my opinion."

As he geared up the computer, he was largely met with silence. It would appear the rest of the student body disagreed with his statement. Arching his eyebrows, he started up the recording programme that enabled us to access our lectures online. It meant that there would be a lot of students skiving off given the opportunity, but it was the perfect tool for students who were ill or wanted to use the lectures to revise.

"History," our lecturer began. "It happened a long time ago. So, why do we bother studying it?"

He let his arms drop to his sides and assessed our class. Nobody dared open their mouth. Imagine being the first student to speak in a lecture for the entire degree!

"Come on," he waved his arms. "I can't judge your opinions if you don't give me any."

"We study it to learn from the past," someone called from the back.

"Good start," the man nodded. "History has  _all_ the answers. When looking into the past, it's tragic when you see how many follies get repeated over time. Good. Anything else?"

"To learn more about people?" someone else suggested.

"Expand on that," our lecturer looked intrigued as he stared out into the crowd.

"We can only learn more about human development by comparing the achievements of our ancestors to our own," they continued, an edge of panic creeping into their voice.

"I like that idea," the lecturer said and received a relieved silence. "What else?"

"To trace back to records and review how social, economic and political systems developed over time."

Heads turned, including mine, to see a girl with short, cropped hair and ice blue eyes sitting rigidly in her seat. She looked a little uncomfortable to have the entire lecture glass looking her way, but she straightened her back and held her ground.

"Very interesting," the lecturer looked impressed. "I like your way of thinking. As you can see, there are various takes towards studying History. I'm sure you all have your own individual reasons, but we don't have enough time to go asking about that right now. Post it on SmileNote or something. Anyway, my name is Himaruya Hidekaz and I'll be the main co-ordinator for you degree over the three or so years you choose to study there. Feel free to call me just Dr Hidekaz. In fact, us lecturers  _love_ it when you gives us a small 'Dr'."

The lecture fell into full swing after his introduction. It was strange. The short speech had somehow been inspiring to me. I wanted to learn every aspect of history I could and to see Dr Hidekaz vigorously throwing words around the classroom based on our subject made me see the potential in how much I could glean from this course. For some reason, the worries of Freshers' began to slip away like paint running down a wall. My future at World University suddenly seemed brighter. As long as I was seated in a lecture theatre or seminar room, learning all I could about the world behind me, then my mind was in a studious state of distraction. It was everything I needed right now to keep me from moping about home.

When the lecture finished, everyone began simultaneously packing their notebooks away. I was cramming my pencil case into my rucksack when Jim sprang out of his seat and began edging away. When both standing, it was amazing to appreciate just how tall he was. Following him down the row, I was surprised to come across the girl I had seen briefly during Freshers'. Her hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail and her golden eyes widened to see me.

"You," she said. The blonde girl who had spoken in the lecture was with her. "Hey."

"Oh, hi," I tried not to be too nervous. I hoped she didn't remember me as being too odd.

"What did you think of that?" she fell into step beside me as we left. "Bummer, if you ask me. If things continue as complicated as that, then I'm screwed for the rest of the year."

"I'm sure that's not true," I filled in nervously.

"Believe me, it is," she puffed out her cheeks. "I don't even know how I managed to scrape in this far. I forgot to ask your name. What's your name? I'm Chiara."

"Sakura."

"Nice to meet you, Saks," Chiara beamed. "This is Pia. I hope you don't mind me asking, but what halls are you in?"

She was asking so quickly. My heart was pounding. Could I keep up with whatever she was saying? Halls. She wanted to know which halls I was in.

"Tudor Halls," I said, panicked.

"So lucky," she pouted. "You're close to the food. But it also means you're catered. I'm in Bonaparte Halls and Pia's in Qing."

They were just further up the road, then. For some reason, it was comforting she felt the need to point this out. If I didn't have the chance or invite to eat with my flatmates, then it felt good to know I could always ask Chiara. She felt extremely friendly and, although quiet, there was nothing wong with Pia, either. I had hopes with the pair of them.

"Speaking of food," Chiara began waving her Meal Plan card in front of us, walking backwards. "I'm seriously hungry. Who's up for lunch?"

"Sounds good to me," I mustered the courage to speak, with Pia nodding beside me.

"I checked the maps earlier and there seems to be plenty of places to eat across campus," she explained. ""There's this big place- a cafeteria kind of thing- where we can eat? I think they do a range of food, like burritos or sandwiches."

"I could eat anything," Pia said.

"Great," Chiara grinned from ear to ear, before turning swiftly on her heel. "I think I'm going to get a coffee and a panini. I've heard paninis are practically the way to go when eating food on campus."

"How much money a week do we get on our Meal Plan per week?" I asked, internally reminding myself not to go mad.

"Seven and a half thousand Yen," Pia said.

"That's loads," Chiara waved a dismissive hand, a wide smile on her face. "We'll have loads of surplus for the following week."

"It doesn't carry over," Pia added solemnly.

"Wait,  _seriously_?" Chiara gawked. "This is how they'll get their money, then..."

"It's a bit annoying," I said, as we meandered towards the food court. "I guess it just means we have to strategically spend every penny."

"Welcome to student life," Chiara beamed fondly, just as the three of us wandered into the Garden of Food-en.

Several different scents hit me at once. I could smell the beef chilli burritos Chiara had mentioned earlier, but also what appeared to be cheesy jacket potato and an array of different paninis and toasted sandwiches. It was bustling and busy and, although I was still recovering from the nerves of Freshers' week, my stomach was now growling at the prospect of food.

"Oh gosh, the burrito queue is  _huge_ ," Chiara groaned.

Looking ahead, there was a long line of students who had accumulated before the burrito bar.

"There's still the regular food bar," Pia pointed out.

"I really wanted a burrito," Chiara grumbled, but allowed herself to fall into the far shorter line of the regular food bar. "I've heard from a few second years that they're really good."

"This'll be just as fine," I assured her.

"Guess this is why most people live off paninis," she heaved out a devastated sigh.

We bumbled through the line and, when we reached the front, there were an array of different foods to choose from. There were paninis with various fillings, sandwiches, toasties, and plastic containers for rice and pasta for salads to be made at the bar. There were crisps and drinks and other snacks that had been picked at by students from before.

" _Six hundred yen_ for a  _panini_?" Chiara was inspecting the meatball one. "That's ridiculous."

"Maybe we won't be saving loads on the weekly seven and a half thousand," I said sourly. "Why are all of these so expensive? The cheapest paninis are still four fifty yen."

"And salads are three seventy-five," Pia scorned, but settled with her plastic container. "I bet the toppings make the price vary."

"Who wants a salad anyway?" Chiara settled for the meatball panini.

The cheese and tomato toastie I adapted to was three seventy-five. The food on the Meal Plan was definitely overpriced. It was clearly a fine ploy played by the university to earn more money from students who were unwilling to prepare their own meals. Sourly, the three of us paid for our food, mourning our spare money for snacks. If I had to sacrifice sweet foods, then it was possible university life was going to leave me looking scrawny. Chiara had muttered about the latte being three twenty-five and had refrained from such a purchase in the end. Our bitter moods were not soothed by the fact that there were no spaces to sit in the food court.

Just as we were leaving through the doors, I bumped into someone and almost sent my cheese and tomato toastie spattered across the floor. Fumbling with the wrapping, I only just recovered it and was glad I hadn't lost the lunch I had paid so much for.

"Dude, I'm so sorry!" the person talking to me flung his hands in front of him, both to steady me, but also as an apology.

Raising my head in surprise, I was met with the most invigorating cerulean eyes ever. My heart pounded at the slight tan, the muscled, lithe body, the ruffled golden hair and the handsome face that could only belong to a comic book hero, or a model.

"Alfie, you should be more careful," a girl with rose gold hair pulled up into bunchies peered past him with concerned, cornflower blue eyes. "Running around corners isn't going to do anyone any good, eh?"

She was probably his girlfriend. It only made sense. Attractive people found each other. No matter how geeky the girl looked, with her large glasses and gawky attire, she was incredibly pretty. For starters, she looked like a young woman, rather than a little girl pretending to be a university student. Handsome guys like 'Alfie', who stood before me with an apologetic expression on his face, would never choose someone like myself.

"I-it's OK," I fumbled for my senses, still taken aback by his beauty. It was hard getting used to attractive men...

"Sorry again, dude," Alfie brushed past me. "Better eat that before it gets cold!"

"I really am sorry about him," the girl paused before me apologetically. "He gets hyper at meal times."

"Hurry up, Mads!" he called over from the burrito queue. "It's long enough already as it is!"

She smiled sadly at me, before hurrying after him. All I could do was slowly turn and watch the pair of them converse about, presumably, the burritos. It seemed some people really  _did_ have the energy to wait so long for their food.

"Hey, Saks."

Turning, I saw Chiara and Pia waiting for me. The former wore a mischievous expression on her face. Cautiously, I approached.

"I see you taking extra glances," she poked at my shoulder. "He was cute."

"I know," I admitted. "But maybe she was his girlfriend..."

"Who has a  _girlfriend_ in the  _first week_ of term?" she sneered. "She's probably just his friend. Guaranteed."

"Some people come to university with their partners," Pia pointed out. "Also, my flatmate is now 'dating' this guy she hooked up with during Freshers."

"Fuck buddy, won't last," Chiara rolled her eyes. "Go for him, Saks."

"I'm not going to steal someone else's boyfriend," I gawked. "That's not the kind of imagine I wanted hanging over my head."

"In my family, we take what we want," she insisted.

"In  _my_ family, we respect other people's relationships," I found myself laughing.

For the first time in ages, I finally felt relaxed and happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sakura Honda: Female Japan  
> Kiku Honda: Japan  
> "Jim": ??? (although I think you guys can guess who this is)  
> Chiara Vargas: Female Italy  
> Pia Beilschmidt: Female Germany  
> Alfred Jones: America  
> Madison Jones: Female Canada
> 
>  
> 
> \- 7,500 Yen is equivalent to approximately £50 or $66.  
> \- 600 Yen is roughly equal to £4 or $5.50.  
> \- 450Y = £3/$4.  
> \- 375Y = £2.50/$3.50
> 
>  
> 
> \- Things became so much easier at university once I started making friends with my coursemates and flatmates, but also including myself in outside activities. I joined the badminton society and have met a friend for life there!  
> \- It really did take me a long time to adjust. I first started university on the 18th September, but I didn't actually feel comfortable there until the 27th October! Specific dates, I know, but that's because the 27th was the first day that I'd stopped marking my calendar until I could go home for Christmas.  
> \- Honestly? Don't be like me. Put yourself out and there and keep yourself busy. I moped around in my room for longer than I should have.


End file.
